Monday, 11 July 2016

Can’t run away from your past

I am a 45-year-old man and this is my story of how I cannot lead a normal life anymore. I am an ex-convict. I was released form the prison 3 years back. I have left the life of crime but the society thinks otherwise and still treats me like a criminal. I’ve got no friends. My family doesn’t want to be in touch me and the worst of all, no body will give me a job because of my past.

I use to steal cars and then sell them with all the necessary paper work. I was a pro at what I did. I had quite the reputation in the hood. This is not something that I’m proud of. But back then I was living the dream, a stolen dream. At the age of 22, I had made more money than my entire family collectively. I was busted when I was 23. I have served 19 years in prison!

Lesson Learned:
A day didn’t go by without me regretting what I did. I used to repent my choices everyday. Prison taught me a lot. I lost my family, my friends and not to mention I lost all the money I had earned. No body visited me in those 19 years. My family was ashamed to claim me as their own. I use to sit and contemplate everyday that after my release, will things ever go back to normal?

Free to go:
I was released at the age of 42. I lost my teenage years to prison. All my friends had achieved a lot till then. They were married, had a family of their own and most importantly, they were happy! My release was a new beginning for me. But I was little too late for new beginnings. I don’t have a college degree, no education, no special skill set, nothing! Only thing I was good at was conning people.

1st impression is the last impression:
After my release, I wanted to take up a job and live a normal crime free life. Only problem, nobody would hire me because of my past. I’m still a criminal according to the society. Nobody believes a word I say. I’m trying to change but society won’t let me.

Past haunts:
All this was very frustrating and I had no one to go to for help. Sometimes all the stress made rethink if I should get back to stealing cars as after all I had to feed myself. I don’t want to be a criminal again. I want to lead a clean life. I want to give it back to the society but the society won’t let me. Stress, frustration and starvation started giving me negative thoughts. I started distracting my self from such thoughts. They started coming more frequently and it started becoming more difficult to dodge them.

Out of 1000 letters that I wrote to my family, one of them must have worked its charm!  My brother secretly started meeting me. He started feeling sorry for me and decided to help me out. He bought me a magical device by Swartantra. It’s called Moksha. He said this was specially made for me and the positive vibrations that it will produce, will help me reduce all the stress and frustration and will make fighting negative thoughts much easier. I started using it everyday. I am very thankful to my brother for gifting me Moskha in the real sense.

I don’t know if my life will ever be the same or not but I know one thing for sure, I will never be a criminal again. Ever.

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